NEW HAVEN (The Borowitz Report)—After a report from the Yale Center on Climate Change Communication showed that the term “climate change” elicits relatively little concern from the American public, leading scientists are recommending replacing it with a new term: “You will be burnt to a crisp and die.” Other terms under consideration by the scientists include “your cities will be ravaged by tsunamis and floods” and “earth will be a fiery hellhole incapable of supporting human life....”
Thank you to everyone that came to support us and bring food that was so awesome. Thanks for everyone that spread the word that was so dam kool. Would like to thank those from New York that sent love to us by ordering a pizza for us that was the best.
Global teams of Greenpeace environmental campaigners have simultaneously staged direct actions to block two separate oil rigs headed to drill in the Arctic, the group announced Tuesday.
Early on Tuesday, 30 people occupied a rig owned by Russian energy company Gazprom while it sat in the Dutch port of Ijmuiden. According to Greenpeace, after five hours the activists were forced off the boat—which was headed to drill in the Pechora Sea. They were detained and remain under arrest.
Across Canada, movement organizations are preparing for the People's Social Forum, coming up in August. There's a buzz of excitement and anticipation in the air as committees elect delegates, and strategies are debated. When hundreds of activists gather in Ottawa in a few months, we will be drawing from a rich, long-simmering cauldron of theoretical discussion and insight issuing from astute on-the-ground observations.
Editor's note: The long time spokesperson for the masked Zapatista National Liberation Army (EZLN), stepped down on Sunday, declaring in a statement read to supporters and sent to media outlets that he, Insurgent Subcomandante Marcos, "no longer exists."
For people just tuning in, the idea that people in Brazil would be protesting the 2014 World Cup makes about as much sense as New Yorkers’ rebelling against pizza. And yet here we are, less than one month before the start of theCup, and demonstrations bear the slogan #NãoVaiTerCopa, or “There will be no Cup.”